Jan 16

What people talk about late at night where Davin works:

Two co-workers were working late one January night trying to complete their annual self assessment, and finish their development plan for next year, due on the very next day. One of these workers named Andrew had formerly been the supervisor on the other, named Brian. As Brian was typing in his prose like verse extolling the various virtues he had championed the previous year a chat box popped up and following exchange ensued.

Andrew: How are u man?

Brian: I heard you were in a multiple car accident today.

Andrew: Yes. I totaled my car.

Brian: … you know what the French say about accidents? “Love…it cannot be found by looking for it or by passionately wishing for it. It is a sort of divine accident, and the most wonderful of all things in life.”

Andrew: Already making jokes in 2010.

Brian: …I am sure she must have been a silken beauty, to draw your eyes from off of the road.

Andrew: I wish.

Brian: Only because you are working on your development plan, do you deny it.

Andrew: I see you just completed your plan.

Brian: …working so late tonight and reminiscing about those who have worked with me last year…do you suppose just one of them had thought when thinking of me “Come live in my heart, and pay no rent”. If not, what did I really accomplish last year?

Andrew: ?

Brian: Just this last Monday as I handed in some work at the office, my mind wandered and I looked down and thought “The human heart, at whatever age, opens to the heart that opens in return” when I looked up everyone saw that I had tears.

Andrew: u ok?

Brian: Late at night here among the cubicles in engineering I sometimes standup above the partitions and yell at the top of my lungs “I don’t want to live. I want to love first, and live incidentally.”

Andrew: You should be writing books instead of engineering.

Brian: Don’t dismiss what has happened to you today so easily. It is sad not to love, but it is much sadder not to be able to love.

Andrew: sure.

Brian: I know its difficult for you. The best feelings are those that have no words to describe them…. My development plan is “the life and love we create is the life and love we live.” What our hearts give away is never gone … It is kept in the hearts of others.

Andrew: hmm

Brian: Before the crash…that moment where time slowed down do you suppose as she looked at you, she was thinking “The sweet, rustic smell of the rain, fills my nose, my head, and my brain. The springtime showers soak my dress, and toes tingle with a grassy caress. The beauty of this day is lost to me, as the deaf man hears not the melody. For all Nature’s wonders seem so dim, when I am here, looking at him.”

Andrew: ok

Brian: So that’s why you had that accident don’t you see?

Andrew: why?

Brian: Your gaze invoked loves natural urge to merge. Real love is feeling like being a part of that person’s life almost isn’t enough. It’s more like a feeling that you would live in the same skin with them if you could and share every thought, heart beat, and emotion as one….you wanted to get together. So you crashed! Do not be one that says “Love bade me welcome, but my soul drew back. . .” Rather sing with reckless jubilee this score more and more

Give me a kiss, and to that kiss a score;

Then to that twenty, add a hundred more:

A thousand to that hundred: so kiss on,

To make that thousand up a million.

Treble that million, and when that is done,

Let’s kiss afresh, as when we first begun

Love puts the fun in together,

The sad in apart,

The hope in tomorrow,

The joy in the heart.

Jan 15

Check this out…

Jan 7

This is the girlfriend-update again.

So Butch is living in Utah County again. Worked for the Wendover Ambulance for 3 months. Now he works for Savage Trucking out of American Fork, UT. He’s had this job for about a month now and just getting the swing of things. He had training for a week down in Price, then some training around Christmas time locally. He’s already had at least a week’s worth of normal driving for this company now. It’s nerve-wracking work for 12 hours a night but he’s plugging along.

He works nights, which is usually about 5 pm till about 5 in the morning. So it will eventually take it’s toll on his health, I’m sure.

He sure misses his daughters. In our new place we have two bedrooms, so one is going to be transformed from a storage room into a bedroom for his 2 daughters. He was able to send a pretty good Christmas out to his daughters this Christmas. And they loved their gifts. He can’t wait to see them and spend time this summer with them. We’re hoping to have them for a good portion of this coming summer.

His oldest daughter apparently is having issues with her mom and their house. The daughter says on myspace that she’s dating a 19 year old guy when she is only 15 years old. So Butch investigated that a bit and tried to contact his daughter and ask why she’s dating such an older guy. She denies he’s 19, says myspace won’t let him say he’s 17. Who knows… Anyway, so we’ll see what goes on with all that.

Butch wants me to type in some of his thoughts about the government, etc. But I’ll just copy and paste what he writes on his facebook here.

“Obama doesnt need to resign..greedy people need to die….our nation is in the pits because rich get rich meanwhile poor get poorer…the oil industry made billions a month for five years that gas cost 5 bucks a gallon…do the math..and why cant they bail the country out…we got lots of real filthy rich people..and a… bunch of real poor people in the world and the middle class bustin their ass to balance it out!!”
“wake up..everyone wants to blame one person..when its the upper class with their greed and using money to power making the laws and regulations that are putting the responsibility on the shoulders of the working class heroes!! and the poor are getting a free ride…with welfare!!! Obama needs to go after the filthy rich and make them give back to the economy..all these rich ass oil men dont need 350 billions dollars in their bank accounts!! period!!”
“bill gates has enuf money..to give every house hold in the country 50,000 dollars…and then we all scratch our heads why the economy is down…HELLO!!!”
“our problem is simple…the rich politicians want to make it seem complicated to confuse us…and it works because people are sheep…GREED IS THE PROBLEM PERIOD!!! not anything else…the banks want your money..the irs wants your money…rich people want your money!! they dont care about anybody else…”
“we need laws regulating how much money one individual can make….I think 250,000 a year is the limit that one should make…that is a comfortable living for any body…with ten kids that is enuf!!! period!!!”
“but these opinions just may get me assassinated by those rich greedy wastes of life..that drive their hummers and pollute the world..none of them care about the future of our children…not a single one of them!!!”
“go ahead drive your hummer…your kids are feeling the reprecussions themselves as well…so if it makes you feel better go look cool out their on the freeway in your hummer…be my guest!!! but dont come crying when the ozone is not keeping you and your family from getting cancer”
“be filthy rich knowing their is someone good out on the street starving and freezing to death…if it makes you feel like king being all rich and corrupt enjoy it while it lasts…because it probably wont be so good for you in heaven!!!”
- was all written on January 3rd, 2010.

And that’s all she wrote!